French Nudity – Get ’em off!

Posted by on Wednesday, June 18, 2014 in Culture, Expressions, Nudity, Seduction | 0 comments

Tu m'as déjà vu tout nu.

Tu m’as déjà vu tout nu.

As I’m a blog virgin I was wondering this morning what on earth my first blog could be about. Then the subject was given to me on a plate or should I say in next door’s back yard. We stepped out of the house into the back yard to go to the supermarket. The next-door neighbour was standing by his back door having a cigarette and told me he was very hung over following a 50th he’d been to the night before. Today was one of those exceedingly rare sunny days and he was just in his jeans. My 3-year-old daughter was shouting ‘morning’ but couldn’t see him because she’s short. I lifted her up so that she could speak face-to-face and she declared to me that he was ‘tout nu’ which means ‘naked.’ In French that is not Japanese or any other languages as far as I know. We got away with it because she said it in French but I grassed her up to him anyway.

So there we have our topic. Let’s talk about nudity – well the top half of the body and tenuously link it to learning French.

The French have tended to be a bit less prudish than their across the channel, much loved (snicker) cousins. In my youth it was the norm to see women sunbathing topless (les seins nus – bare breasts), my mum and my aunt included, much to my disgust. French adverts often flash tits if there is a shower or bath scene. Here’s an example from YouTube.

These days there aren’t as many around (boobs that are bare on the beach that is – I should imagine there are more actual breasts in the world than ever before). I looked at a French forum and saw that the English term ‘topless’ is being adoped too. 

So ‘un peu’ ‘a little’ context…

Être nu(e)(s) – to be naked

Nu is pronounced as ‘noo’ rhyming with ‘moo’ (cow noise). Listen here to practise with me.

This example was kindly shared with me by Nadine Chadier who has a site on pronunciation in French as well as other Frenchy things.

To practise the ‘u’ sound some more there is a very annoying children’s song called ‘Le Petit Ver de Terre’ (the small worm – literally worm of the earth) about a naked worm that was nearly eaten by a crane (the bird type) but found refuge in a cabbage (I hope I haven’t spoilt it for you by telling you the end). Warning silly high pitched voice.

Anyway back to being naked in French – ‘Être nu’
We’ll conjugate that so you can say it about everyone should the occasion arise.

Je suis nu(e) – I am naked
Tu es nu(e) – you (informal) are naked
Il est nu – he is naked
Elle est nue – she is naked
On est nus – we are naked (this doesn’t only mean ‘we’ but in spoken language this is what is used more)
Nous sommes nu(e)s – we are naked
Vous êtes nu(e)(s) – you (formal, plural) are naked

There are extra ‘e’s and ‘s’ because it depends on the gender and number of people involved.

Example from today – exemple d’aujourd’hui
Le monsieur est tout nu! – the man is (all) naked!
Le voisin est tout nu! – the neighbour is (all) naked!

Non, ma cherie, il est torse nu, il porte un pantalon. – No, darling, he’s topless (literally naked torso), he’s wearing trousers.

If the neighbour had been a woman the phrase would be:

La voisine est toute nue! – the neighbour is (all) naked!

Useful phrases:

Vous êtes belle avec cette robe mais je crois que vous devez être encore plus belle toute nue. – You are beautiful in this dress but I think (believe) that you must be even more beautiful naked.

It is a useful exercise to listen to French in order to tune your ear and pick out words you recognise. Even if you don’t understand you can eventually get the gist which is as much as you need to get by. Here is a short film by Alexandre Tisseyre I found on YouTube which is to do with nudity.It helps to be interested in what you watch, listen to or read to.

Other ways of saying naked in French are :

Être déshabillé(e)(s) – to be undressed
À poil* – ‘les poils’ is body hair so this means wearing nothing but your body hair (nice). This is slang which is why it has an asterisk.

Ways of telling someone to undress would be for example :
À poil !

If you were being more formal (you never know, stranger things have happened) or speaking to more than one person (you never know you might get lucky) you need to use the ‘vous’ you form.
À poil ! (if you want them to do it quickly)

Or if you want someone to undress you say :

Je préfère me baigner à poil. – I prefer to swim naked.

Vocabulary for torso bits :

Breasts :
Les seins (m)
La poitrine (can mean chest too)

Tits :
Les nichons* (m) (actually nipples but used as tits) – pelotte mes nichons – feel my tits (nipples)
Les miches* (f) (can also mean bum – depends on context) se cailler les miches – to freeze one’s tits off
Les tétons* (m) (actually nipples but used as tits in when used as slang) jolis tétons – nice tits
Les doudounes* (f) (not to be confused with slang for puffer jackets and stuffed toys/blankies that babies use as soothers)
Others include : loches, lolos, nénés, nibards, roberts, roploplos, etc. Endless tit names analogies.

Tummies/pecs :

Tablette au Chocolat

Tablette au Chocolat

La tablette de chocolat is the French term for six-pack (my neighbour was sporting one this morning)
The less toned bellies are called :
Le bide* – faire un bide – to do a belly flop
Le bidon* – gros bidon – fat belly
The saggier ones are called:
La bedaine – pot belly

La brioche – muffin top

If a man has a beer belly   you can say he has  ‘un bébé kro’ because he looks like he is pregnant with Kronenbourg beer.

To listen to the pronunciation of tits etc. in French please watch this informative video.

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Associated lessons here include : how to conjugate a verb, adjectives, être, subject pronouns, pronunciation, using tout le monde (yet to be written!).


Article Name
Nudity in France
The French are more liberal with showing off their bits. You'll see a lot more willies and boobs in films. Learn how to say the many different words for boobs in French.

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